What would Brian Boitano do If he was here right now? He'd make up a plan and he'd follow through That's what Brian Boitano'd do
Brian... skate Brian... FIGHT
When Brian Boitano was in the Olympics Skating for the gold He did two sow cows and a tripple lutz Wearing a blind fold
And when Brian Boitano was in the Alps Fighting grizzly bears He used his magical fire-breath And saved the maidens fair
Brian... skate Brian...
So what would Brian Boitano do If he was here today? I'm sure he'd kick an arse or two That's what Brian Boitano'd do
Brian... skate Brian...
When Brian Boitano travelled through time To the Year 3010 He fought the evil Robot King and saved us all again
And when Brian Boitano built the pyramids He beat up Kubla Kahn Because Brian Boitano doesn't take shit From anybody...
(No, Brian! Those chicken wings are really spicy! Don't eat those!)
I've never seen a man eat so many chicken wings (x7)
Brian... skate Brian... FIGHT
Well Brian Boitano was born On the planet of Kreynuk He came to Earth to save us all From war and death and stuff
Heighdy-ho and heighdy-hey! Brian Boitano's here! So round up all you lass's And tell him em have no fear
Say come over here my honey And I'm gonna take off my pants And I'm gonna make dirty love to you 'Cause that's what Brian Boitano'd do 'Cause that's what Brian Boitano'd do
